And Another Thing...

A Beautiful Butterfly...er...Wallaby...

Ta-da!  Olivia's new wallaby sweater in a custom dyed colorway called "A Beautiful Butterfly".  I originally found this yarn at a Yarn Harlot event in Detroit last year, in a fingering/lace weight.  After some deliberation, I messaged the dyer and asked her to do a custom dye in worsted weight for this sweater.   I had her dye it using a superwash merino so that it would last through all three girls, because this yarn did not come cheap.  I knit a 10 and added a little bit of length because Olivia has a long torso and long arms.  This will fit her for at least 2 years and then the other girls should get plenty of wear out of it.

  I'm so happy about how beautiful this turned out!  It has all the colors of the butterfly at the end of The Hungry Little Caterpillar and it is indeed beautiful.  Thar yarn is absolutely wonderful to work with and I enjoyed just about every minute of this project (I admit that the sleeves and the hood were daunting, but that had nothing to do with the yarn, only my impatience).  In fact, there are two colors in this yarn that I am thinking of asking Ann to dye for a sweater for Saragh. 

Love at first snow...

We sure had a lot of fun playing in the first snowfall of the year! 

Brownies Can Do Anything

Yes they can!  I thought I would take a minute (or 5) to tell you why we are now a fully invested Girl Scout family.  We've known for years that we wanted the boys to be in Boys Scouts and we are charter members of a great troop, but I have always been a bit apathetic about Girl Scouts.  I was a girl scout off and on while I was growing up, mostly off and I really didn't get much out of it.  But, last year, Olivia wanted to give it a try and my friend needed a co-leader for a Daisy troop, so off we went.  Even throughout the year, I was not fully invested and if Olivia didn't want to continue the next year, I was perfectly fine with that (I'm one of those really odd parents that would love it if my kids weren't involved in anything, I guard our family time very jealously). 

But then in May, our troop went to Encampment which is an area-wide event that brings girls of all ages together to do fun things and spend time together.  The first thing that struck me was that a troop of older girls offered to let us hang out with them for the day; we got to eat lunch with them, they helped the girls navigate the games, and they really made a point of fully engaging those little girls in whatever they were doing.  It really impressed me that these adolescent girls would give up the freedom they otherwise would have had, just to help our little Daisies feel comfortable at their first Encampment.  Never once did it appear that they would rather not have our girls there.

The next thing that really effected me was at SWAPS time.  Because the Daisies are so little, they only swap with cadets so that it's not so overwhelming for them.  Now, I didn't realize this before, but the older girls really  put some time and effort into their SWAPS and have really extensive collections.  They were totally willing to open up their collections to the little girls, who obviously don't have the same skill level when it comes to making SWAPS.  Again, not one girl appeared to have negative feelings about this.

After we had our SWAPS, we lined up for a little procession to the big circle where we were about to have the bridging ceremony.  The Daisies are first in line and then Brownies, Juniors, etc. all the way up.  When the procession started, we marched to a big field area and made a circle.  As we were marching in the circle, I looked back and saw this huge line of girls and women and it just hit me that all of these girls had grown up in this awesome environment with the encouragement and support of these wonderful women who were giving their time and talent to the girls.  I saw girls laughing and chatting with their leaders, obviously well bonded.  We sat next to a troop of high school girls who were talking about needing to leave after dinner.  Two of them had Confirmation the next day and one of them had a date.  Her leader asked her who her date was with and when the girl gave his name, the leader exclaimed excitedly.  It was quite clear that she was privvy to information about this boy because the girl had confided in her.  Well, let me tell you, there is more that impressed me that evening, butthat hooked me right there.  The fact that that girl had confided this information about this boy to her troop leader made me want to run over and hug that woman and thank her for being such a trusted adult.

Before the bridging ceremony, we were told that it is tradition in our area that the Daisies give the graduating seniors a flower.  The graduating seniors had done it as Daisies and now it was coming full circle for them.  The bridging ceremony starts with the Daisies that are bridging to Brownies and goes on up from there.  So, you can imagine how excited everyone was to see the seniors bridge to adult status.  It was truly moving to see how proud the graduating girls were and to see how much their leaders love them.  It was particularly striking because my oldest daughter was one of the Daisies handing them their flowers.  I could clearly imagine her as a senior, getting her own flower from a Daisy and remembering that she was once that little girl.

So, all of these things led to me to the conclusion that Girl Scouting is something that I really want my girls to do.  The idea that they could grow up, surrounded by that much love and support is incredibly appealing to me.  I think that the more supportive and caring adults that they can count on in the next few years, the better their chances of becoming really great women. How lucky these girls are.

Yes, Brownies can do anything because they have supportive and trusted adults to help them navigate through the very windy roads as they grow up. 

Reality check

Even though I am working hard on organizing our life and house right now, at the end of the day everything is still messy.  You know what, I'm kind of okay with the mess.  I can look around and know for certain that we really used our house today and I know that in about 15 years, the messes will dwindle as the children leave us.  Yeah.  I'm okay with the mess.

Steadier Days

For the past few months, I have been reading this blog about becoming a more intentional mother.  I have to admit that until last week, I was still reading it through heavily skeptical eyes.  For those of you who don't know me all that well (and to make those of you who do chuckle) I may have a slight problem with authority and rules.  Therefore, it follows that I also have issues with schedules and organization.  I mostly feel that all of those things cramp my style.  I like to be able to run off and do things on the spur of the moment without worrying about what I'm not doing. 

However, I was definitely finding myself and the children to be in a rut.  I noticed that the TV was slowly taking over our lives again, I was on the computer all day long, nothing was getting done around the house and we weren't rushing off on any exciting adventures; planned or unplanned.  I felt as if we were slowly coming apart at the seams and life felt chaotic and harried all the time.  Every member of the house could feel it too which was just making things worse.

So, last week while I was perusing Amazon, the book "Steady Days" kept popping up on my recommended books list.  On a complete whim, I put it in my cart and then ordered it.  When it arrived, I was still very skeptical.  This book had the potential of ruining my life and making me do things that I didn't want to do.  For whatever reason, I picked it up before any of the other books (that I was much more excited about) and started reading.

One of the first thing I read as I flipped through the book was this,

Some people think that if they become organized, they will lose their spontaneity and passion for living.  Because they really value these qualities, they think they must accept their disorganization in order to maintain their free spirit.  This doesn't have to be the case.  Having a flexible structure helps you enjoy spontaneity.  If you have taken the time to be organized in the things that matter most, then you will not feel behind.  So when an opportunity comes your way, like the first warm day of spring or a special concert for the children, you can ditch the rest of  your plans and go for it.  You can enjoy without guilt because your other responsibilities are up to date.

That simple paragraph really clicked with me and I was hooked.  Over the past few days, I have written and implemented a morning and afternoon routine for the kids and I and we are all adjusting to it rather well.  It made the days flow much smoother and we all were engaged and interacting with each other.  I am really looking forward to this becoming the norm here and where that will take us.

I'm not saying that this was a miracle cure for all the ails my family, but it is certainly clearing up some of the symptoms!  "Steady Days" has become my new go-to book for getting through the day with grace and making the changes that are necessary.  I encourage you to get a copy of this book and check it out for yourself. 

Boy Scout Camp

The boys went to Camp Frontier at the Pioneer Scout Reservation in Ohio last week.  Wednesday was Parent Night, so we went down with another scout parent to check things out.  This was the first experience either of them has had away at camp.  Although they were very excited to have this adventure and were having a tremendous amount of fun, they were both very glad to see us on Wednesday.  I'm very happy to say that Ben hugged me so hard, it hurt!

Ben was dubbed "The Kid With the Hair" by his fellow scouts.  You can see why they'd think that.

We got to eat dinner with the boys and after they consumed enormous amounts of food we had a lovely conversation.  As I watched nearly every boy go back for seconds and thirds, I deduced that 90% of the cost of camp was for the food.

Braidon participated in the Root Beer Cantina which I gather involved drinking an unhealthy amount of root beer in a very short period of time.

This is where the boys learned all kinds of stuff like lashings, rope tying, survival skills, first aid, etc.  The fenced in area on the right side is a human foosball table.

This is the tent where Braidon did some of the work on his fishing merit badge.

I may be biased, but I think these were the two best looking boys at the whole camp.

On a serious note, the boys had great time all week long.  This is including, but not limited to: each of them earning 3 merit badges, passing the swim test on the first try, learning a bunch of new things, eating as much food as they wanted at meal time and  surviving a tornado by hiding out in an unfinished latrine.  All in all, a very good week.  They're already talking about next year's camp.

Making the house fit

I am always changing things around here, trying to find the best fit that is also aesthetically pleasing.  When you cram 7 people, 2 dogs, a cat, some kittens and a guinea pig into 1600 square feet, you're going to have to do some juggling of furniture to find the best arrangement.  Well, we have been here for 4 years now and I am still diligently working on it.  I've finally found a color scheme that I like and I am slowly working it into the whole house.  But the furniture?  That's a whole other story...

This is our family room where it all happens.  This is where we snuggle, read, play games, watch television, you name it.  We do have another room that we could gather in, but no one seems to like it (which I will tackle at a later date...).  I am always trying to figure out a better way to fit the couch, chairs, tables and dog beds in here and I have yet to find an arrangement that I really like.  I think I am going to start looking for a nicely used Ektorp corner sofa to put in here.  I wanted one from the start, but due to financial constraints, I'm living with the free loveseat.  

I LOVE our TV cabinet.  It is such a great piece and it works perfectly.  The cabinet is an antique pie safe that my mother used for storage since before I can remember.  A couple of year ago I strong-armed her into giving it to me to use as a pantry.  When Oliver and I were trying to decide what to buy for a TV cabinet, we both suddenly realized how perfect it was.  I am planning to paint it and style it up a bit, but I have no idea when I will get to that.

The next issue is the dining area.  I LOVE my table, it's absolutely perfect for our family.  Unfortunately, it is way too big for my dining ares which is only 100 square feet.  When we put the leaf in, this bad boy expands to nearly 10 feet long!  What we would like to do is put in a banquet underneath that big window and wrapped around the corners.  If we do that we will not be able to put the leaf in which would be a problem when we have guests.  I think we'll still do it, we'll just have to figure out alternate seating.

So I'm not sure there is actually any point to this post.  Maybe just to vent a little and roll some idea around.  If anyone has any suggestions or perhaps an extra $1200 for the new sofa, leave a comment!

 

Family Dinner Time

Family meal times have gone by the wayside, some studies say that less then 50% of families eat together 7 nights per week.  Parents are working more, kids have sports and scouts and clubs and friends and no one has time to eat together anymore.  Also, teen drug use, suicide and pregnancies are on the rise again.  Kids have no sense of belonging in their own families and seek "family" elsewhere.  Parents are at a loss as to how to bring their families back together.  All the activities and work seem necessary and parents don't want short change their kids.  What a lot of parents don't realize is that they are short changing their kids by not putting the family first. 

For many years now, I have resisted putting our kids in every activity that comes our way or sparks an interest.  I did not want to be one of those moms that ran her kids from this activity to the next.  Don't get me wrong, my kids have had their share of activities.  We've just tried to find alternatives to the mainstream in tense activities. 

The boys and Olivia participated in a homeschool soccer league for a couple of years, that met on Saturday mornings for practice and the games.  The girls have participated in a homeschool dance group that meets during the day.  We just put all the kids in karate, all on the same day at the same time. 

My point of all of this is this, I have always felt a strong compulsion to protect our family dinner time.  Even though I am with the kids all day long, we are not a complete family unit until Oliver gets home at six o'clock.  Six o'clock has always been the highlight of the kids day, they love it when Daddy walks in the door. 

Family dinner time gives us the chance to come together and share our day with each other.  The kids all get a chance to talk about what has happened, what plans they have for the rest of the evening, what goals they have for the next day.  Ben and Braidon get to talk about the games they have made up, the LEGO creations that came to life and what things they found on the trail during their many bike rides.  Olivia gets to show off her new reading skills and giggle about fabulous 7 year old things.  The little girls talk about their new imaginary friends and show off all the "tattoos" they tagged themselves with.

Not only do the kids get to tell about their day, Oliver and I also get a word in edgewise sometimes.  Oliver is always happy to answer questions about his job and the things that go on at his office.  He talks about science, math, woodworking, outdoor skills, you name it.  I love to make him laugh when I tell him about all the funny things the kids or pets did during the day.

We also use family dinner time as meeting and planning time.  Our table is the birthplace of many camping trips, field trips, and household projects.  It is also the place where we discuss family issues and problem solve to make things run more smoothly.  Many things come to light during the magic that is family dinner time.  This is the place and time where the kids seem to feel comfortable broaching heavier subjects.  Since we try to make a point of being open and honest, our table is where our kids learn a lot.

When I was sick last week, we missed family dinner time 3 nights in a row.  Everyone kind of ate as they wanted to instead of gathering as we usually do.  As I started recovering, I noticed that the household was really in disorder.  Not only was the house physically a mess, but the people in it were all discombobulated.  There was more yelling, more door slamming, more hitting.  We were starting to come apart at the carefully crafted seams.  In the next few days, we gathered again to eat as a family and I saw us coming back together.  For us, family dinner time holds us together and helps us feel cohesive and peaceful.

I don't know what kind of family we would be if we did not have this time together every evening.  I think we would be distant and out of sync and the thought of that is disconcerting.  I like that we have made it a priority to carve out this time to gather and regroup every evening.  It makes us a family.

Spring Cleaning List

Okay, I did decide to do some spring cleaning and also decided to keep the list updated here.  It gives me some measure of accountability.

Inside

Kitchen

• cobwebs
• windows
• top of fridge
• under fridge
• under pantry
• lazy susan
• get grippies for rugs
• make valance for sink window
• get blinds for sink window

Dining Room

• cobwebs
• windows
• mop floor
• wash curtains
• wash walls
• contact paper on keyboard tray

Family Room

• clean out TV cabinet
• wash slip covers
• wash pillows and blankets
• air out rug
• mop floor
• windows
• cobwebs

Book Room

• clean out fireplace
• dust bookshelves
• air out red rug
• mop floor
• wash rugs
• clean slip cover
• wash curtains
• repaint doors
• repaint trim
• clean out chest
• cobwebs

Basement

• clean out fridge and move to garage
• clean out under stairs
• cobwebs
• rearrange shelves and purge
• clean up gray room
• get couch?

Garage

• clean out shelves and purge
• new recycling solution
• bring up fridge
• move garden tools and hang up

Outside

• rake yard
• plant grass seed
• turn veggie bed
• remove leaves from front beds
• stones for house bed
• sweep patio
• clean behind workshop
• clean side of workshop
• paint fence section
• wash all windows
  

Unschooling :: Anatomy and Physiology

(Olivia took the top three photos herself)

Olivia spent a morning recently tracing her hands and feet and then decorating and labeling them.  She initially decorated the wrong side of one of the hands which led to a lengthy discussion about the differences between each hand and how we can tell our left from our right.  She basically has that part down, but does have to think about it from time to time.  At first she didn't understand why I thought she had decorated the wrong side of one hand, but after we talked about it she understood that the thumbs needed to be pointing in.  The boys even joined in and gave suggestions and information, it was a really great discussion about something that I think we all take for granted. 

One of the things that I love about unschooling is the inordinate way I see my children discovering things.  I firmly believe that the knowledge Olivia gained that morning is something that will stay with her, vividly, for the rest of her life because it meant something to her.  She wasn't labeling worksheets, she was making her own creation, giving it style and glamor and in the meantime we helped her give it meaning.  It's a beautiful thing.